


Drunk Love

by Vesuvius_ly



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Caleb Widogast Deserves Nice Things, Drunken Confessions, Drunkenness, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, Minor Fjord/Jester Lavorre, Mollymauk Tealeaf Deserves Nice Things, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, widomauk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-10-28 18:54:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17792852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vesuvius_ly/pseuds/Vesuvius_ly
Summary: After beating Blemmy's crew at the Blushing Tankard, a very drunk Molly and Caleb spend some time dancing together and Caleb says things that Molly was not ready to hear.Or: Molly and Caleb are both pining after each other but are too scared of rejection to voice their thoughts. Thankfully alcohol has a way of bringing people's guards down.





	1. Inebriated

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic to this platform so let me know what you think! I realize that Molly has been dead for months now but I will never get over Widomauk so have some fluff and angst because why not.

In Molly’s opinion, everything was better when you were drunk. Jokes were funnier, colors were brighter, and the snake tattoo on his palm seemed to swim on his skin in a way he found all too fascinating. Molly also enjoyed when other people were drunk. Aside from the handful of mean drunks he had met in his two years of living, he found most people to be more compassionate and open after a couple rounds of ale. Judging by the way Caleb was sloppily dancing with Jester, it was clear the man had lost all of his usual social barriers in his alcoholic haze, and despite how terribly he was dancing, Molly could not help but find Caleb incredibly attractive. Shy Caleb was cute and sweet, but drunk Caleb was confident as hot as hell. At least Molly was pretty sure Caleb looked hot right now. It was kind of hard to tell with his double vision.

With a final shot of liquid courage and some incoherent encouragement from Beau, Molly left the bar to join Caleb and Jester on the dance floor. The Tiefling giggled as Molly stumbled over and made way for him to join in what quickly became the three of them awkwardly holding hands and dancing in a circle. It was fun for the first few songs, but soon Molly was wishing that he could just be dancing with Caleb. He wanted Caleb to teach him how to waltz. He wanted to put his arms around Caleb’s waist and stare into his beautiful blue eyes and kiss his lips for hours and ….wait

Maybe it was a good thing that Jester was third wheeling. Molly was clearly far drunker than he thought if the only thing he could think about was making out with the gorgeous wizard next to him. Not that he didn’t think about doing that often, just usually it took a little bit more time for his train of thought to end up there. Now the thought was all consuming.

No, stop that. You are very drunk and he is even more intoxicated. He doesn’t want to kiss you so don’t kiss him. Molly squeezed Jester’s hand a bit tighter to ground himself. After a month of languishing over his crush on Caleb, Molly still hadn’t even worked up the courage to tell the man that he found him attractive. The last thing Molly wanted to do was suddenly force himself on Caleb when he was too inebriated to know what was going on. But still, it was tempting. Too tempting.

Molly was about to excuse himself from the dance floor when Jester’s gaze shot up past him and towards the bar. He followed her deadly stare to see that her eyes had trained on Ireena making not-so-subtle advances at an almost unconscious Fjord. Without a word, she dropped Molly’s hand and marched over to Ireena in a way that made Molly fear for the woman’s safety. Thankfully though, it seemed Jester was more worried about getting Fjord upstairs than she was murdering the dwarf.

With a sigh of relief at the avoided confrontation, Molly turned to find himself inches away from Caleb’s face, dancing to slow song. This is not good.

“Will you dance with me Mollymauk?”

It took Molly a second too long to register Caleb’s whispered question, and in his inebriated state he could only respond with a mute nod. This didn’t seem to bother the wizard though, who brought one hand to Molly's shoulder and the other down to guide Molly’s hips as they clumsily stepped in time with the music. It was nice. It was more than nice. Caleb was grinning like a fool and holding Molly close and it was everything that Mollymauk had dreamed about for the past month. Well, not everything, but dancing was a good first step.

For a minute it seemed like the dance would never end, but then it did, and Molly was left awkwardly holding onto Caleb’s hip as he traced the snake tattoo on Molly’s hands.

“Beautiful.” His low voice sent shivers down Molly’s spine. “Mollymauk, you are a work of art.” Molly found the courage to stop staring at Caleb’s chest and look into his eyes, and Caleb was making eye contact. Caleb never made eye contact. Ever.

And this, this, was just too much for Molly to handle. He was sure by now that his usual drunken blush had grown enough to turn his entire face pink. He could feel his heart hammering away in his chest. Caleb had called him beautiful. Did he really mean it?

No NO NONONO STOP THAT. He’s not calling you beautiful. He likes your tattoos. He likes your tattoos and he’s very drunk and you’re very drunk and the best thing to do would be to go to sleep because this is not, IS NOT, going to happen. Not tonight.

Using every ounce of his self-control, Molly pulled away from Caleb’s grasp and did his best to ignore the hurt in Caleb’s eyes as he did so.  
“Caleb, we are both very drunk. I am going to go upstairs and sleep, and I think you should do the same.”<

The wizard nodded at the floor, his words coming out slurred.

“Ok Molly, whatever you say. C-can you help me up the stairs?”

“Oh of course love.” Molly smiled as he looped his arm under Caleb’s and practically dragged the man up the stairs. The tiny bit of grace Caleb had had while dancing had completely disappeared, and by the time the two of them made it to Caleb’s room, Molly had to drop the wizard onto his bed. After about fifteen more minutes of Molly trying to get Caleb’s shoes off and get the man tucked in, Molly was ready to leave and pass out in his own room when a hand grabbed his own.

“Mr. Tealeaf.” Caleb grinned up at him.

“Mr. Widogast?”

“What are you doing later tonight?”

Molly couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him. “I’m going to go to sleep love. You should do the same.”

Caleb gave this statement far more thought than it deserved, and Molly was once again about to leave when Caleb whispered “Love? Do you love me, Molly?”

Molly wanted to give this question a response. It deserved a response. But his tongue suddenly felt like lead in his mouth and nothing that he could do would make it move.

“I was just wondering because,” Caleb rambled on “ well, because I wanted to know. Because, you know, I think about you a lot and you are a very colorful and bright person and you call me love but does that mean love as in I love you? Or as in you like me? Or as in you are a close friend? I just don’t know with you. I never know with you, and I want to understand you because you’re wonderful and kind and brave and beautiful and I like you but I don’t know if you like me and it’s terrible because you call me love and I don’t know why.”

Well shit.

The seconds after that confession seemed to stretch into eternity.

“Caleb, you should sleep.” Molly’s voice shook as he spoke. “You have had too much ale and you don’t mean what you’re saying. Tomorrow this will all be a dream. Ok?”

Caleb’s blue eyes were piercing as he stared into Molly’s red ones. “My inebriated state does not change how I feel about you Mollymauk. If you don’t feel the same way though…. then that is alright.” And with that heartbreaking statement, Caleb promptly passed out.

Molly debated waking him, debated shaking Caleb by the shoulder shouting “I love you and I have for weeks and feel the same way!”, but he didn’t. Tomorrow this will all be a dream. Molly clung to that thought as he left the room because he couldn’t afford to think what Caleb said was actually true. Because it wasn’t. It wasn’t. Because if he let himself believe that Caleb loved him back and he let himself fall completely in love with Caleb then he was just going to get his heart broken tomorrow morning when Caleb woke up and came to his senses. Caleb was smart and powerful and gorgeous inside and out and in comparison Molly felt so insignificant. What would such an amazing person want with you? You’re a two-year-old carnie with a poor sense of humor.

Don’t get excited over something that’s not going to happen.

Molly stumbled out of Caleb’s room and back towards his own. When he got there, he was short of breath, despite the fact that their rooms were only a few feet away from each other. In one of the beds, Fjord was already tucked in and fast asleep, and Molly wanted nothing more than to join him in unconsciousness. This night needed to be over. If Molly had to spend one more moment thinking of how softly Caleb had spoken his name he was going to pull his hair out. But try as he might, he couldn’t get Caleb’s words out of his head.<

I like you. He said I like you.

At around 4 am in a cramped room in Hupperdook, Mollymauk Tealeaf finally fell asleep.


	2. Hangover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the second chapter! There's a bit of canon divergence since the party is going to head straight to Shady Creek after partying in Hupperdook instead of fighting an automaton from hell. Also Nott has experienced so many hangovers that she is now immune to their symptoms.

When Caleb Widogast woke up the next morning, he was greeted with the worst hangover of his life. His felt like someone had bashed his head in with a warhammer and sitting up made him want to vomit. Jester’s usual loud and perky voice could be heard through the thin walls of his room and was not making him feel any better. Gods, why did she have to be a morning person? 

Slowly, Caleb managed to find the energy to roll out of fetal position and stare up at the dirty ceiling. Nott was curled up at the foot of his bed like a dog, and Caleb decided to stay still just for a bit longer so that she could sleep more, Yeah, that was the only reason he wasn’t moving. It had nothing to do with the fact the room was spinning around him.

Caleb let his mind wander to what had happened last night. The memories came in flashes. The party arriving in Hupperdook. Meeting Rissa. Beating Blemy’s sorry ass….and then after that things got a bit hazy. He was pretty sure he danced with Jester at some point, and then afterward he danced with Mollymauk. He remembered the view of Molly’s gorgeous red eyes mere inches away from his own and that the two of them had talked about something while dancing, but he didn’t know what. After that Molly had brought him up to his room and then….

_Scheisse_

Caleb replayed last night’s bedside conversation in his head. He told Mollymauk, to his face, that he liked him….and Molly hadn’t reciprocated. The purple Tiefling was wrong, last night wasn’t a dream, it was a heartbreaking memory. Caleb felt strangely blessed by his current hangover. The pain would be a good distraction from his shitty emotional state. 

Caleb quickly got out of bed, grabbing the bedpost for dear life. The room was spinning and the sunlight coming through the window was blinding. Caleb welcomed it, focused all of his mental energy on just how terrible it felt to be alive. But all too soon, his body adjusted to its current state, and soon he felt well enough for his mind to wander back to last night.

No, please. Think about something else.

His mind ignored his pleas, as usual, and Caleb found himself staring at Mollymauk’s gorgeous face rambling like the idiot that he was. _“Love? Do you love me, Molly?”_

_No! He doesn’t love you and you put him in an uncomfortable situation! He already has to put up with your bullshit on a daily basis and you burdened him down with even more emotional baggage. If you had really cared about him you would have kept that to yourself. Because you’re not good enough for him and you know it. You don’t deserve him after all the shit you’ve done! You don’t deserve himyoudon’tdeservehimyoudon’tderservehim_

“-leb? Caleb it’s ok I’m here just breathe with me ok?” Caleb vaguely felt Nott’s hand grab one of his own, and turned to see the goblin starring at him with worried eyes. She was saying something. What was she saying? He couldn’t hear anything over the blood rushing in his ears.

“-athe. I need you to breathe with me Caleb. Ok? Match my breathing. Can you do that please?” And without waiting for a response, Nott took a deep inhale through her nose, and then slowly exhaled over the course of a few seconds. She repeated the action, waiting patiently for Caleb to join her. After ten minutes, Caleb finally felt calm enough to release his vice grip on the bedpost and slide down onto the floor. Nott, seeing that Caleb was done with his panic attack, sat down next to him.

“You haven’t had anything like that in a while…..Is there anything you need, anything I can help you with? If you're in trouble with someone I can just kill them you know, it’s really not a problem.”

Even with all the chaos going in Caleb’s head, he couldn’t help but crack a smile at Nott’s kindness, twisted as it may be.  
“No. I don’t need anything like that Nott, but thank you for the offer.” 

“Do you want me to bring up breakfast for you? You can stay in the room for a bit longer if you want. I’ll just tell everyone that you’re too hungover to come downstairs.”

That option was tempting and honestly pretty close to how he was feeling right now, but Caleb knew that he couldn’t hide from Molly forever. 

“No thank you Nott, although that is very sweet of you. I don’t think this is the type of problem I can hide from.” And before Nott could ask him what he meant by that, Caleb headed downstairs.

Even though it was late in the morning, Caleb was surprised to find that he and Nott were the last ones to come downstairs. The Mighty Nein were sitting at a large table in the back, and everyone besides Jester and Yasha looked like they wanted to go to sleep and never wake up again. It made Caleb feel slightly better to know he wasn’t the only one feeling like trash right now. Caleb sat down and started chewing on some bacon that had most likely come from Beauregard’s pocket and half listened to Nott’s conversation with a very loud Jester.

“Jester, can you please tone it down a bit?” Fjord’s voice sounded hoarse. “Some of us are nursing a major hangover.”

“Sorry, sorry!” Jester stage whispered. “But it’s true though, you know? Last night you were all acting like idiots.” _Of course Jester would want to talk about last night._ “You were being especially stupid Fjord. That Ireena almost took you up to her room!” 

Fjord looked very confused as he listened to Jester. 

“If I’m being honest,” he said, “I don’t remember much of last night. You were the sober one Jester, did I actually do anything stupid?”

Jester smiled. “Not really besides the Ireena thing. You did say some funny stuff after I carried you up to your room though.”

“I did what now?”

“Yeah!” she laughed, “After I tucked you in you started talking about how blue I was and I was like ‘I know right, I’m pretty blue’ and then you went on and on about all the other things you like that are blue like the ocean and sky and those robes that the Cobalt people wear and then you fell asleep. It was pretty funny.”

Fjord didn’t seem to know how to respond to that so he went back to eating his breakfast and Jester continued chatting with Nott. At some point in the meal the conversation shifted to how Beau’s antics last night but he wasn’t listening anymore. His mind was focused on one amazing problem-solving possibility.

 _Did Molly remember what happened last night?_ If he had gotten drunk enough like Fjord had, maybe he wouldn’t. Then he wouldn’t know that Caleb had confessed and there would be no problem. But Caleb couldn’t tell whether Molly knew or not. The Tiefling had barely said anything to him besides a “good morning”, but his unusual silence could easily be because he had a headache like the rest of them. Caleb tried to make contact with the man throughout the meal, a rare occurrence for him, but Molly seemed too absorbed in his coffee to catch his gaze.

. . .

The ride to Shady Creek was quiet, but Caleb found himself unable to enjoy the silence he so usually craved. The group had decided to let him ride on the cart the whole afternoon after Nott pointed out that he needed extra care since he was the party’s squishiest member. He had planned on using the time to read or copy down spells, but he had been too distracted with his own thoughts. Nott must have sensed that his mind was taking him to a darker place than usual, she always knew somehow, and climbed up into the cart with him. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Her voice was soft and open. Caleb knew that he could say no and she would leave. But he did want to tell someone. Maybe she could help.

“Nott, I really messed up last night.”

She shifted closer to him in the cart. “I saw how you were looking at Molly this morning. The others may have been too hungover to notice but I wasn’t. I know that he helped you up to your room last night. Caleb did he… did he try anything? Do anything to make you uncomfortable?”

“No, no Nott.” Caleb murmured “He is far too much of a gentleman for that. I am the one who was rude. Last night, he was just trying to be a good friend. He took me up to my room, got my boots off, and was ready to let me fall asleep but I grabbed his hand, and,” Caleb suppressed a groan _“I told him.”_

Nott stared at him wide-eyed. “Caleb,” she whispered “Caleb Caleb CALEB! This is wonderf-”

“Keep your voice down! Please. It is not wonderful. He...he did not feel the same way”

Nott’s eyes narrowed into slits. “What the fuck do you mean he didn’t feel the same way?”

“What do you think I mean? He does not like me in that way. Why would he? He is beautiful and colorful and I am not. He could have any person he wanted, why would he choose me?”

“Why?” Nott glared at Caleb as if he was the stupidest person she knew. “Because Caleb Widogast you are a smart and incredibly powerful wizard with a kind heart and colorful or not, you are beautiful inside and out. I know that, and thought Molly knew that too.” Caleb stared at the road ahead, refusing to meet her gaze.

“Tell me exactly what he said after you told him”

“What?”

“Tell me,” she enunciated each word this time. “Exactly. What. He. Said.”

“Umm...well he told me that I should go to sleep and that I had had too much ale to think straight and that I wouldn’t remember this conversation in the morning.”

“Does he remember that conversation?”

“I don’t know! I’ve been stressing all day trying to figure out.” Caleb put his head in his hands.

“But Caleb, did Molly ever say anything along the lines of ‘I don’t feel that way about you’?”

“Well no, but he didn’t say I like you back.”

Nott paused a bit. “So he didn’t say yes and he didn’t say no. He might have been too drunk himself to give you a proper answer. I know you don’t want to hear this, but I think the only way to sort this out is to talk to him. You won’t know how he feels otherwise.”

She was right, he didn’t want to hear that, but she was also right about that being the only good course of action. Caleb looked to his right where Molly was walking alongside Yasha. _Tonight, I’ll talk to him then, no wussing out._

Caleb turned to Nott. “Thank you, friend. You always give good advice.”

“Anytime Caleb, anytime.”

. . .

Caleb’s stomach was doing somersaults and he was pretty sure that it didn’t have anything to do with the questionable tavern food he had had for dinner. Fjord had finally left the table to head upstairs, leaving just Molly and him alone at the bar. An awkward silence hung in the air and _Gods dammit_ Molly had to know right? Otherwise he would have said something by now?

“Caleb, ”Molly's voice startled him out of his spiraling thoughts. “How much of last night do you remember?”

“All of it.”

“Oh.” Molly’s voice sounded hoarse, and ...sad?

“How much of it do you remember?” Caleb asked.

“I think I remember everything.”

Caleb gathered his courage. “Do you remember what I said when we were in my room?”

“...Yes.” 

“Molly I-” Caleb began, but was cut off.

“It’s ok Caleb it’s totally fine I get it. People say things that they don’t mean when they’re drunk. I wasn’t going to hold you to that.”

“Oh.” Caleb fought to hold back the tears that were forming in the corners of his eyes. He had been right all along. “I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable Mollymauk. I want to make sure things are still good between us.”

“Of course of course.” Molly’s words came out rushed. “Everything between us is fine. I just wanted to make sure we were on the same page you know? So that there wasn’t any confusion.” 

“Yes of course.” Caleb pulled his eyes away from the bar to look at Molly. The Tiefling looked so sad, and as Caleb looked into Mollymauk’s ruby eyes, he could see his own sadness reflected back at him. 

“Mollymauk,” Caleb’s breath caught in his throat. You don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve him. He shoved those thoughts down. “I meant what I said last night. I do like you, a lot. As more than a friend. And if you don’t feel the same way then that really is fine and I will be fine but I need you to know that that is how I feel.” The seconds it took for Molly to process Caleb’s words seemed to last an eternity but then Molly was smiling. No, he was grinning from ear to ear at Caleb.

“Caleb!” Molly put his hands on the wizard’s shoulders. “I...I feel the same way. I have for months now. But you’re just so great and I didn’t think you liked me that way. Last night when you said that I thought it was the alcohol talking. I didn’t want to get my hopes up.”

_“Was?_ You were worried that _I_ would reject _you_?” Mollymauk you are the most brilliant and beautiful person I know! I have been thinking about how to tell you for a while now, and I just never found a way that seemed right. Last night it just slipped out.

Molly lifted up his hand to cup Caleb’s cheek. “We really are two lovesick fools, aren’t we?” And with that Molly pressed his lips against Caleb’s. Caleb smiled into the kiss, relishing the feel of Molly’s skin touching his own. The kiss was short, and mere seconds later Caleb found himself looking at Molly and feeling like a giddy schoolboy. 

“I have wanted to do that for a long time.” The Tiefling’s tail twitched as he spoke. 

“As have I Mollymauk.” Caleb couldn’t seem to stop smiling.

“So what do we do know Mr. Widogast? What do we do with us?”

“I think… for the time being, we take it slow. If I’m being honest I haven’t been in a relationship for some time. I want to know more about you. To love you in ways that I didn’t know were possible. I want us to take our time with this.”

Molly hummed in agreement. “I am good with whatever pace you want Caleb, as long as at the end of the day I can continue loving you, then that is all I need.”

“Then I think this deserves a celebration.” Caleb waved to the bartender and smiled at Molly. “Let’s start this relationship and the same way we began last night, with a round of really strong ale.”

“That, Caleb dear, sounds like an excellent idea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap! These two will always be my favorite ship from the show and I'd love to write about them some more. If there's another prompt you guys want me to do, let me know!


End file.
